Thoughts From Our Island

6th Grade Writers Share Their Thoughts With The World
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Take It or Leave It

Take It or Leave It
Colton W

July 21, 2009

Have you ever had one of those days where it seemed like every teacher hated you? Well, today was one of those days. I couldn’t wait to get home where there were people who loved me. Although when I get home there won’t be time for those people because I have a date with a 2000 word essay about why Wisconsin is famous for dairy products.
BRRRINNNGGG! The sweet sound of the dismissal bell. I was almost to the end of a very long day. I just had to live through the bus ride home. I was walking up the steps on the bus when a bee flew in front of my face. I jumped back out of fear and surprise. “Smack!” I missed the steps and landed flat on my back in the parking lot. Pain rippled up my spine and to make it worse every one saw it and was laughing at me. Somebody from the back of the bus shouted out “Smooth move”. It made her laugh, the girl with the brown hair and blue eyes that make you nervous every time you are around her. I had been trying to impress her all year long. All of that hard work taken away when she saw me fall.
I jumped up quickly and laughed like it was no big deal, but I felt my face getting red and I started to get choked up. I quickly scurried to the nearest seat where I could hide by the window.
Luckily, no one bothered me the whole bus ride. I was walking towards the front of the bus, staring at the ground, when I saw a flash of green from the corner of my eye. I took a step back and bent down to take a closer look. My eyes widened and my heart skipped a beat. Finally something good happened today.
“One hundred dollars!” I thought to myself. “ I could sure use this.” My conscience was having a war with itself inside my head. “Should I keep it and put it towards the phooze ball table, that I’m only a hundred dollars away from or give it back to the that mocked me?
The decision was made. Even though it would make me happy at the moment, I would feel terrible later on. I grabbed the bill and took it up to the bus driver.
“Wow”, thanks kid, I’ll make sure you get rewarded for this”, said the bus-driver.
As I stepped off the bus, the clouds parted and warm sunlight washed over me. A great feeling of happiness conquered all the anger and sadness inside me, and I knew that this wasn’t such a bad day after all. I had made the right choice.


I love how you hooked your

I love how you hooked your reader with a question.  You used great details to engage your audience. Nice work. 

Stacey Schuh

6th Grade Teacher


Yeah the beginning of the

Yeah the beginning of the story was interesting and made me want to read more and find out what happens. And like Mrs.Schuh said you used a lot of details.

 good job

 

steph


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